We had a lot of ups and downs lately… and I’m glad that were able to get through with the downs. My baby just planned to leave me few days ago. It was horrifying and terrifying! I was extremely sad back then, so as my baby. I felt all kinds of emotions before and didn’t know what to do! I was panicking, on tantrums and on the verge of breaking down. I even uttered different words/a different language back then unconsciously. I didn’t think that my baby could do that again to me – thinking of leaving me. My baby did that a couple of times already, saying that being tired is the reason. Good thing I begged to my baby… b’coz it really seemed like my baby’s decision is final and about to leave me forever. I begged…said please, no, no…I cried… I remember even saying “I’m dead without you…” I was not sure what to expect, because my baby was crying and looks like really about to let go. But at the back of my heart and mind, there was still that chance to change my baby’s decision. And so it did. I was happy… My baby promised that leaving won’t always be the option to chose whenever emotional stress bursts. I will always remember that. The sad thing though, is that I cannot do the other way around…
We both know what our situation is… but we have different ways on dealing with it. In my part, I just don’t think about it. I don’t think of anything else… I just think of how to spend quality time with my baby. I erase all negative thoughts and see our present life together and happy. My baby deals with it the other way ‘round – thinking of the situation and becomes sad in the end. I really don’t want my baby to always feel sad, that’s why I’m doing everything just to save us. I make sure my baby’s happy all the time! It’s completely effortless though, because I know that whenever we’re together, my baby’s happy and so am I.
All I can say now is that in everything we do babe, let’s put love first. We both love each other and that’s the biggest reason why we are still together… Nothing can replace my love for you. My love for you is bigger than the universe, higher than the sky, and sweeter than sugar. I’ll stick around no matter what, babe. You know I’ve made some sacrifices for you already… Those aren’t enough to show my feelings for you.
Now that we’re apart, you are there and I am here, haha, I wish that you are doing fine with Alden… I hope that all you think about is how rich our love is. You know why I said that… LOL, we are so poor right now. I hope that you know how much I love you, and that I will always stay this way. I love you baby! I’m missing you so much right now… and I dedicate this song to you:
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