Monday, January 16

Where are you?

It's past 1am and I'm still waiting for you to show up. The last message I received from you is "What did they tell you? Eat well, okay." It's been 5 hours since then... I have no idea what's happening to you right now, but I hope you're fine or just sleeping (even though I asked someone and said that you aren't). Where the fuck are you? I'm worrying too much that I can't eat or even sit still. I don't know what happened to us, but I hope you still believe how much I love you. If only I can go and find you... I'll definitely do it. I'm sorry if I've been bad lately. I know that you sacrificed too much for me. I'll do the same for you babe.

I fuckin' wish I have the power of teleportation and tell myself to go wherever you are. I suddenly thought you haven't eaten yet when I left you. Please don't make me worry this much! I might as well just take a knife or blade to cut myself and keep the pain from goin' on and on.

Please, I'm beggin' and kneeling... Give me just one sign that you're okay. What would I do if anything happens to you? My eyes are full of tears, my hands and knees are still trembling. I won't sleep until you message me! I won't eat until you tell me to do so! I don't know how much did you drink, but I hope you handle yourself. I wish our hearts are truly, literally connected to each other for me to know where you are, what you're feeling and doing. If only...

I'm starting to think that I don't deserve this, that I don't deserve you. I'm still waiting, babe. I love you. I'm sorry and I promise to be better. I promise to be the best for you.

I'm waiting, and then you called me just now. Thank you so much. You made me feel so much better. ♥

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